12 Steps to Nakedness

I’m going naked. Read at your own risks

1. The people who were responsible in making me the documentist that I am includes:

a) My Kajian Sejarah Tempatan teacher in primary school. My apologies for not remembering her name but she was the one who got me interested in history and facts. It felt damn good to know more than others.

b) Zulkifli Zakaria, or as some of us would know him as Joe Kidd. His Aedes fanzine and Blasting Concept column in The Sun also played an integral part in shaping up the documentist in me.

c) Weng and Lee, the guilty parties behind Biodegradable Material (it’s a fanzine just in case you don’t know. The piece called Diary of a Loner rank as one of the best local writings ever. Heck, it even inspired me to come up with my own fanzine, Piss Of Mine: A Forum of Thought.

d) Sheryll Christine Stothard, my former editor when I was working with TONE magazine and the lady who gave me the opportunity to experience “commercial journalism”.

e) Zainal Alam Kadir, my former editor and the guy who got me a job after being jobless for six months after TONE folded. He made me broke the duck when it comes to interviewing mainstream artistes. Oh, he also initiated my maiden Grammy experiences.

f) Last and definitely not least, are obviously my parents. I’m extremely blessed to have a parent who is ballsy enough to let their son do whatever things that he wanted to do and do best.

2. The only ambition I ever had in life was to become a graphic artist, hence why I decided to go to ITM (UiTM as they call it now) and take up art & design. However, I wasn’t good enough to be a graphic student, as deemed by the lecturers. Even before I could even think, what’s next for me, I was approached by a fashion department lecturer by the name of Anas Musavir to give fashion a try. I did and it was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. Really, being the only straight guy in a class of 16 females… Hmmm

3. I used to own a BMX and used to call her Shika… Bashikal, get it? It was my ride when I was studying in ITM, it also added some level of coolness to me.

4. I used to play in couple of bands, and they are:

a) It was called Snugarage. Why, because the place where we used to jam was snug and it’s a garage. Lame, I know. Our inspiration was, honestly speaking I’m not really sure, but I know Bad Religion was a firm favourite of mine. We did record a demo, which had five songs. It was never properly released though, if you happen to have a copy, do let me know. The demo cover had a Toto Schillaci pix on it, why, I have no idea. My band members, we had Boy on guitar, Zeff on drums and Buyong on bass. Me, I try to sing and play guitar at the same time. We only performed live once, at Dewan Sepak Takraw Segamat.

b) I also had a stint in this band called The Macho Morons. The line up was Fahmi on guitar and vocals, Zainol on guitar, Apeng on drums and me on bass. We played live once and never really recorded anything. Our music was inspired by Epitaph and Fat Wreck Chords type of punk rock. That and hedonism to the fullest.

c) My last band – well I won’t consider it a band as the only thing we did was to jam twice and design our band logo – was Bastards Society. It was kinda a supergroup – Zam porno from Penang mincecore combo, shocked on guitar and drums and noises, Ezer from Reclamation Code on vocals, bass, drums and whatever things that can be trashed, Boy from Disaster Funhouse on drums and myself on guitar, bass, drums and vocals, well more like shrieks than singing. Our music – noisegrind.

d) After all these attempts I concluded that it will never be something that I’m good at. I do write songs on my acoustic guitar and have two songs; well it’s more like hooks and riffs. If I’m not mistaken, only my former colleagues in TONE and Mokhtarizal from IseekMusic have heard the songs.

5. I met my wife for the first time in 1998, in a bus, the 222 bus. I was on the bus with my course mate heading to University Hospital to visit our lecturer. She boarded the bus at the Seroja hostel bus stand and my God, the first thing that caught my eyes was the round eyes, the lips, the tak jemu mata memandang face and the ass! She was wearing a white Esprit pant, which she still keeps and wears till today. Believe it or not, my self esteem weren’t that great then, so approaching her was not even in my modus operandi, instead what I did was to write something on a piece of paper, it reads something like this – “I’ve always thought that Smurfs were the cutest, but hell you proved me wrong today” – cheesy, I know, but it worked. We’re madly in love still and are blessed with a lovely pair, Adam and Hawa. Alhamdulillah.

6. For some bragging purposes, my profession have given me the opportunity to meet/talk/interview cool international people (in my universe that is) like Brian Wilson of The Beach Boys, Stevie Wonder, Steve Earle, Yoko Ono, Curt Kirkwood of the Vaselines, Mani of The Stone Roses and Primal Scream, Motorhead, Jill Scott, Suede, Keane, Franz Ferdinand, Gary Numan, Noodles, Richie Unterberger, Guy Garvey, Dino Cazares and few others which I’m too lazy to recall. Oh, I’ve been to the Grammy’s too, not once, but three times, as an audience, as a member of the media, walked the red carpet, attended the post party, what else. Thanks a zillion Nini for the opportunity.

7. I’m fascinated with serial killers. I have quite a number of books that documents, analyse and discusses about the subject. I still think that Hannibal Lecter, despite being a fictional character, is the coolest monster alive. Ed Gein, Richard Ramirez is cool too. Given the opportunity, I’d love to beat the writer for From Hell for making Jack The Ripper such a loser in that film. I really enjoyed the torture scene in Odishon.

8. I hate Eddie Vedder. I dismiss Pearl Jam’s music. They brought us clones of third grade grunge wannabe clones. I hate Courtney Love too.

9. I’m addicted to history and facts. I’m not a fan of fictions. I know my imaginations are creative and colourful, hence I don’t need other people to stimulate my mind.

10. I’m seriously considering working on a book. As a matter of fact I have been working on two books, one on the local fringe music scene and the other one on local hip hop music. However, I’m extremely unhappy with the pace that I’m going, can somebody kick me so that I could go faster. Or maybe I should just put on pressure upon myself by releasing a book on my writings throughout the years first. I dunno?

11. My first celebrity crush was on the late Nuraina Emir. The list now includes Liv Tyler, Jennie Garth, Rese Whiterspoon, Angelina Jolie, Anne Hathaway and Nikki Taylor.

12. I used to be called Koyi (when I was in Primary school); Aie (by friends from secondary school and friends from childhood); Eri (friends in ITM), Punk (by my ITM house mates); Adly (by colleagues and former colleagues), Nyot (by my wife) and Papa (by my son and daughter).